Been a while

Been a rough few months. Birthday was normal. Valentine was crappy. Cny was fattening. And clp is still a headache. Screwed up my health. Screwed up my weight. Been a lazy bone for months.

However, dispite the bumpy journey, I learned a few things along the journey. I am childish immature and emotional. I very bad in verbal discussion. I have difficulties in transferring my point to another. I may think that's the best solution for a certain dispute but it turn out that's the worst solution. Having another encroaching into your path is annoying. But without knowing it, a person will some how encroach into other's path as well. That include me. I am slow in thinking for a defense for my case, by the time I form my defense, I'm suffering emotional break down. I have words that can't pronounce. I am bad in hearing. And also comprehending what I'm listening.

Everyone have flaws. But that form the uniqueness of us human being. To stand out from others, either worsen the flaws to get unnecessary attention, or improve the flaws to make myself a better person. Having flaws is not fatal. What is fatal is knowing your flaws but still live in denial. Acknowledging the flaws but not taking action for it, is as bad as knowing murder is a crime yet he still kill. What makes a crimal a better person is when he acknowledge his mistake, accept his punishment and came out as a changed person. That what make a person precious. That what makes humand different from animals.

I sound like a total confused trouble child. But at least I acknowledge it and making an effort to improve myself. And I still hold on to my own beliefs and dignity. I'm still Nichole but just a better and improved Nichole, soon.




Love,
Nichole

相信

----

Word of the day:

Croyez. Believe in French.

----

What's the truth behind the lies?
And how much tears behind the truth?



Love,
Nichole Low

泪

----
Word of the day:
泪. Tears in Chinese.
----

The day I stop crying, is the day my heart closes the gate to anyone.


Love,
Nichole

Hidden

Sometimes certain info are better to be kept then be told. And therefore white lies. And sometimes I rather not know than giving myself more burden and trouble. Well, at least just allow me to be selfish for once.

Fading

----
Word of the day:
퇴색. Fading in Korean.
----


I'm starting to feels that it's fading. After all the expectations and requirements. Is it a curse or what.

To keep the memories, I took a walk down the lane. Slowly. Knowing that it wont be there anymore. But I still have that tiny hope.

Looking back is a taboo. But I do not know what is placed in front of me. I have no clue. And I am terrified. No one knows the future. But some create theirs. And also creating others'.

River of thoughts swirling in my mind. And tears rolled down without knowing. Nothing can makes me smile from my heart. Guess this happened when we grow.

That simple life. That small warm place. That secret area. That freedom when I ride. That wind.

A place filled with memories. But it's getting further.


Love,
Nichole

Expectations

Sometimes I really wonder why I have to live to other's expectation and not be myself. And why people likes to make others live to their expectation? Human being really is a confusing creature.

Stories

----
Word of the Day:
이야기. Story in Korean.
----

Every person have their own stories to tell. It is whether they tell it to others as a lesson learned; whine to others as misfortune; Or chose to hide it and not tell.



Love,
Nichole

Phrase of the year

STUPID BLOODY FUCKING SKINNY BITCHES...!!!

Pretty

----

Word of the day:

매우.Pretty in Korean

----

Behind all pretty things are not necessarily pretty. It might be pretty heart breaking and painful.

Love,

Nichole

I am just the normal ordinary girl

----
Song of the day:

When You wish Upon a Star - by Lois Armstrong



----


I am just the normal ordinary girl who want to be in the lime light everywhere I go.
I am just the normal ordinary girl who wish to be pretty and attractive.
I am just the normal ordinary girl who want the best of everything.
I am just the normal ordinary girl who want to be smart.
I am just the normal ordinary girl who wish to have a good life.
I am just the normal ordinary girl who don't wish to be grounded.
I am just the normal ordinary girl who fight for freedom.
I am just the normal ordinary girl who want to have the best dress.

But in reality, life aint easy and does not goes according to want you want and want you wish for.
So, work hard for what you want and pray hard for what you wish for.


Love,
Nichole